A legal letter for your amusement

Readers, I received a packet in the mail from my attorney’s office last week.  It contained a letter that merits sharing and I have included it below.   This is a single scene in a seemingly endless legal saga, back and forth in preparation for a trial to reconsider Ex’s child support amount. Ex had been paying only enough child support to keep his driver’s license which amounted to $25 every two months, a small fraction of the amount ordered by the Court.  He petitioned the Child Support Recovery Unit to reduce his obligation based on his assertion that he made roughly $4,000 last year.  They plugged that into their formula and recommended that he pay the minimum, $40 a month.  (Did I mention that the guy is an attorney?  It’s a pretty classic case of voluntary and spiteful poverty coupled with outright deceit.)  Even though the Court has not ruled on the change, $40 a month is exactly what Ex has been paying for the last few months.  (He is probably hoping not to be called a deadbeat—he is angling to win an election, after all.)  We objected to the $40 recommendation and a trial date is now set for December 10.  Readers, for your amusement, a letter sent to Ex from my attorneys:

Awesomesauce and Awesomesauce

Attorneys at Law
October 18, 2010
Ex of Bitter Divorcée Fame
Podunk Nowhere

Re:  Deposition

Dear Mr. Bitter,

I understand that my staff gave you a courtesy call to find a mutually agreeable date and time for your deposition to be taken in the pending child support review to which you replied “I don’t f***king think so.”  Enclosed please find a Notice of Taking Deposition for November 9 ….  [Readers, Notice of Taking of Deposition, for those of you who don't know,  translates into "I DO f***king think so."]

I am also enclosing a Request for Production of Documents for your response within 30 days.

Very truly yours, [maniacal laugh]

Awesomesauce Partner [note:  no "esq."]

[credentials my attorneys possess and Ex does not listed here]


My apologies to the staff of Awesomesauce and Awesomesauce, though the person who really owes you one is Ex.

1 comment to A legal letter for your amusement

  • Tom Hunter

    The year I lived in Russia I made more than $4,000.00. (But of course I was paid in Rubles.) How does he keep a straight face when he argues to lower his child support?

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